A Purpose And Meaning
by Gemini-moon1
Summary: An AF fic Sometimes the logest Journey begins with a single step...( Or maybe a little push)
1. An Old Friend

Looking around the dirty hotel room she decided she would need to find an apartment of her own and soon. Looking back she still couldn't believe what had happened. She had only been in jail for two months when the "Powers That Be" had decided that she was needed in the world again. The murder charges and been completely stripped from her record. Most would have said that she was lucky, that this was the best thing to happen in her life, to her in was like being ripped out of a warm embrace by strangers. She just wished that she could go back. How could they just let her out? She had killed, tortured, caused pain, most to which people who just wanted to help her. She was a monster, she should be put in a cage and never let out, she just wanted it all to end, but it wouldn't stop not yet, she was brought out to do something. But of course the all mighty "Powers" never told her WHAT she had to do, so all she could do was wait for it. She got off the bed she was sitting on and walked over to the dirty window to watch the sun set. "What am I going to do?" Faith said to herself.  
  
  
  
Across town in a old hotel a handsome man who appeared to be in his mid- twenties sat up in bed with a start. Angel got up from bed and quickly walked to the joining bathroom and splashed cold on his face. He leaned on the sink looking down at the floor desperetly trying to clear his head. He quickly looked up and saw the bottom of the mirror and quickly looked away. He had gotten the hotel recently and hadn't been able to get the mirror out yet. Every time he looked into it and saw nothing staring back at him he knew he wasn't human, he was a monster. Well WAS being the main word. When he stared into the mirror long enough he would start to see the face of an innocent he had killed, a life he had taken. But he didn't have time to think about that right now. Faith. He had had a nightmare about Faith. He remembered it perfectly. He had been sitting on the sand of the beach staring into the ocean with full silver moon hanging over it. Suddenly Faith was standing next to him in a long dress, dark raven hair down flowing in the wind, looking like some beautiful, dark goddess. He had reached up to grab her hand when she was pushed from something behind her and she fell to her knees in front of him. He looked around suddenly to see who was there. His father and mother were standing next to each other, his sister was standing in front of his mother, gripping their mothers hand s as they rested on her shoulders. Then a look of rage he used to know so well came over his fathers face. MONSTER! WORTHLESS! He screamed at the top of his lungs. But he didn't stop he kept screaming those words over and over. He could feel himself feel like he used to when he was a young man. Like he was trash and his father was some unbreakable wall keeping him locked up in a corner. He felt a soft hand touch his check and slowly and gently push his face in the other directions. He could see Faith perfectly even though his eyes were beginning to water. She began to lean forward like she was about to kiss him when he had woken up. Now all he felt was guilt and he should was the first thought that came to him, first of all he wished he hadn't woken up, he wanted to know what Faith's lips felt like against his, which he knew was wrong because even if Buffy had moved he was still in love with her and that love couldn't be betrayed, no matter how stupid it sounded. Second Faith trusted him. He couldn't go visit Faith in jail when he was dreaming about making out with her on a beach He didn't want her to think he was like that. They were friends. He could tell her anything about how he felt and she would understand him completely and he was the same for her. He wasn't going to be like all those other men she knew who got close to her to have her body. He wanted to know her mind, feelings, and soul. Yeah she looked like a goddess but that's not why he wanted to get close.  
A half an hour later Angel was walking into the lobby of the hotel when he heard loud familiar yelling.  
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN SHE"S NOT THERE!!" yelled a female voice. "I told you I talked to the head of the prison. She was there but cleared of all charges." Came a english sounding voice. "Cleared of all charges! She is a murderer! She even admitted it! They just let her out.!  
Angel walked into the room quickly a feeling of dread taking over him. "Guys, what's going on?"  
Wesley turned to him completely straight faced. "It's Faith, she's not in jail and we have absolutely no idea where she is."  
  
So how do you guys like it so far? I hope you enjoyed it. Just so you know this a Angel/Faith fic. I'm not sure about the other characters. I'll do whatever you guys want for those. 


	2. Of Whys And Hotel Rooms

Faith sat on a park bench all alone with her arms rapped around her knees. Every once in a while a love struck couple would pass by. The man would always glance at her quickly or sometimes just stare then the woman would glare at her. "The story of my life" Faith thought to herself. What did they see when she looked at her? What did anyone see when they looked at her. She hated people looking at her, especially men. She never let anyone look at her. At least not the real her. No, that's not true, Angel. She had broken down and let him see, even in jail she would tell him how she felt. She hadn't meant to, every time he came to see her she said she wouldn't open up this time but she did, she always, always did. She wasn't a person meant to be seen, she should be kept hidden. What the hell is wrong with me? I used to be bold confident, bold. What happened she thought to herself. Why is it so hard to just think, why can't I make my body move!?! Move hand, move!! It didn't, it just lay there. WHAT!?!!? Why wont......why is it so dark!?! Move! Her whole body was shaking. Move! MOVE MOVE MOVE MOVE MOVE!!!! Suddenly hands gripped her shoulder. She could already feel the tears going down her face. Why? Why do I keep thinking that, no I'm not, those aren't my thoughts, but they're in my head they must. No there not. WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY!!!! Stop thinking that just stop. Suddenly her whole body turned around quickly against her will and she looked at the stranger looming over her "why..." she heard herself say in a quiet whisper. Then everything went black.  
  
Earlier That Day At The Hotel  
  
"What do you mean she ISN'T there!? Of course she is, I just saw her there three days ago, she's there on a murder charge, if she had gotten out she would have told, or come to see me!" Angel said with a straight face, of course on the inside he was panicing. If she's out she would have come see me or at least called, unless she was kidnapped, or a vampire got her when she wasn't looking, and killed her or changed her into a soulless monster, or she's hurt and she's all alone and there is no one to help her and she's scared. "Well our own homicidal maniac was set free." Cordy said with her usual mock humor. "Well where is she NOW!?!" Wesley looked up from the table. "They don't know, they let her go and that's the last time they saw her." "And that's it, they just let her go? They didn't know if she had a place to go or if any one was waiting for her! Just, I hope you enjoyed your stay in prison, have a nice life!?!" "Angel, Faith can take care of herself, she'll be fine. We can look for her in the mourning." "Fine, you look for her in the mourning I'll look now." "Angel come back!" To late thought Cordy as she watched her friend leave. She and Wesley hopelessly as he stared at the."  
  
  
  
Gotta find her. Were the only thoughts that seemed to be Angels only thought as he ran threw the park. Oh yeah that's great genus just run like a idiot through the whole city, that's the best way to find her, what do you think you'll just look over you shoulder and she'll just be sitting on a bench some where waiting for you to come and get her. Well there she is, sitting on a bench right in front of her wanna go ask her? WAIT! WHAT?!? He look over and recognized her pretty dark form immediately. Every muscle in his body relaxed and he gave out a sigh. She's all right. No, she isn't.  
  
It may have been dark he could see her as if it were as bright as day. She was huddled together like a scared child, and her could see her shake violently. He came up behind her and put a hand on her shoulder. She stopped shaking and went deathly still. Nothing happened for about a minute then she turned around like she had heard a gunshot and looked up at him. "why...." Her voice, usually bold and confident, was sad quite and sounded almost like a whimper. Then he watched her eyes close and her body go limp. "NO!!" He reached down and caught her before she hit the ground.  
  
  
  
Faith opened her eyes. Where am I? was her first thought. She had been in the park sitting on the bench feeling sorry for herself like a spoiled bitch, now she was...in a hotel room? Apartment? Hotel room turned apartment? It was obviously still being worked on. Nothing like Torry's place. He hadn't found her had he? Torry was an okay guy if not for his constant attention. He was always trying to hug him and pull her close to him. If she had been the way she used to she would have screwed him, but she wasn't like that now. She was good. Still a whore and a slut but at least not acting like it any more. She looked around. Some one had taken her shoes off and put her in a warm bed of silk and satin. Who? Suddenly the door began to open. Oh no..... Angel.  
  
  
  
I come up the stairs with a warm plate of food. Faith might want to eat when she wakes up. Faith. I'm not worried anymore. I'm angry. Three days and she doesn't come to see me or even call. I thought we were friends. Didn't she want to come see me? Didn't she like me? Did she just talk to me when I came to visit out of boredom? A man. She smelt like another man. She hadn't slept with him there wasn't enough of a sent for that, but she let him hold her, for no reason. She only let me hold her after she had a breakdown. I care about her more, I know I do, I.....love her? I can't really finish the thought, I opened the door and see her sitting on the bed staring right at me. Something comes to me. She just didn't me to see her, She didn't want anyone to see her. Why? Why had she said why? She was so warm when he found her, and shaking had she had a fever? I went over and sat in a chair next to the bed and put the food on the night stand. "I brought you some food" My anger turning into concern, how does she always do that? She looks so helpless sitting there under the covers. My slayer, my goddess, my Faith. MY Faith? She isn't yours stupid. "Thanks." "Faith what were you doing on that park bench?" "I don't know, I just went out to kill some vamps, I sat down and couldn't stand up." "How long were you there for?" "I don't know around three, four hours." "What!? Why?" "I don't know, I couldn't move." I see tears in her eyes again and I know how scared she was. Hardly anything makes Faith cry. I lean over and pull her close into a hug. I know I shouldn't but I can't help it.  
  
  
  
"I don't know, I couldn't move." And I was scared, I think to myself, but I keep that to myself. The last person I told I was scared like that was when I was four years old. I told "Stacy", my mom when she got home from the bar. I called her mommy and told her I was scared she started hitting me, and screaming at me never to call her mommy. She was Stacy not mommy. She didn't want to be my mommy. I start to cry as I think about it. I feel Angel's arms go around me and pull me into a hug. He's holding me tight like I'll turn to dust if he lets go. My night in shining armor I think to myself sarcastically only to bring up another unwanted memory. "What 15 and still a virgin! What, you waiting for your knight in shining armor to come save you? No you ones going to save you? Why would they?" "Stacy" begins to laugh. I feel myself stiffen and pull out of Angels arms. He saved me, he always does but he doesn't want me. I look at him, he looks a little hurt, but that's just my imagination. He looks away quickly and asks "Where have you been staying?" "A motel 6 across town." He gets a sad look on his face, I know he thinks it's pathetic. "Why didn't you tell me you were out?" Now he's looking at me. "I didn't want to be out. I wanted to be alone closed up. Not out. I was going to see but I wasn't ready." "Who was the man?" he asks slowly like it was something he didn't want to know. "I'm not always with a man, Angel. I don't always act like a whore." My voice dripped with venom. I'm different now, you now that right? I'm not like that anymore. I changed. Do you care or notice? Or am I still the same to if I am I might as well change back. "N..NO! I didn't think that! When you I carried you in you had the sent of a man on you. I know you didn't....do any...there wasn't enough sent on you for...." "It's okay" I say to try to stop his stuttering. He knows I've changed, he is to embarrassed for me to think otherwise. I smile at him "He is a guy I meet, he's sweet but a little creepy. He's always trying to hug me and stuff but he's nice.  
  
  
  
He's always trying to hug me and stuff but he's nice Okay, I REALLY don't like that. Some "creepy" guy can hug her but if I touch her she pulls away. Just thinking about sends a shot pain through me. I care about you more then he could. "Angel, you okay? Your like spacing out on me." "Yeah, just maybe he's not the kind of guy you should hang around if he acts like that." She smiles again, I love her smiles. "He's not that bad, just a little clingy." "Umm, maybe, seeing as you don't have a place to stay yet, you could live here there are plenty of rooms, it used to be a hotel." "Hotel?" "Long story, I'll tell you later." "Sure I'll stay." I try not to look insanely happy and start jumping up and down. "I'll go with you to get your stuff tomorrow." "It's just some clothes." She says quietly. "I'll go with you anyway." I'm glad I can talk to her with her without the glass between us. I can be near her now and it makes me happy. I wonder if she feels the same.  
  
  
  
It was just me and Angel the next day. Cordy had a date and spent all day getting ready. Wesley talked on the phone all mourning with some guy named, Lorne. Apparently there is something going on at Wolfram & Hart. Big surprise there. Angel had Wes come in and check up on me the next mourning to see why I was so sick the night before. He just took some blood samples and left. I can kind of see why he wouldn't want to be around me. You don't want to be in the same room long with someone who once spent hours sadistically torturing you. As soon as night came Angel drove me to the motel where I was staying, Angel was practically glued to my side the way up the stairs. Had it been any one else I would have shoved them away. But Angels special. We get to my room and open the door. Someone is inside. "Torry"  
  
Next chapter there will be more evil doing and more slaying. 


	3. Stuff That Happened

"Tory?" Faith asks as she walked through the door way. "What are you doing here?" she asked still wondering how he had gotten into her apartment. "Faith!" he said smiling at her. "I called four times but you didn't answer and I got worried and came over, I just got here." He said giving her a quick friendly hug. Still standing in the door way Angel watched the whole confrontation through narrowed eyes. "Oh, I was fine just out." She said smiling. He could be so sweet sometimes. Suddenly she remembered Angel standing quietly in the door way. "Oh! Tory this is Angel, he's an old friend and I ran into him and we..went out to eat. Angel this is Torry." "Hi." Torry said giving an odd look to him almost like he remembered him. "Hey." Angel said giving him the best smile he could under the circumstances. An uneasy silence filled the entire room as the two men continued to stare at the other as Faith rocked nervously on her feet. Suddenly she clapped her hands together. "So yeah,..Angel you were going to help me with my clothes?" "Yeah I am." He said finally taking his eyes of Torry and walking behind Faith for the dresser pushed up against the wall. "Clothes?" Torry asked giving Angel a glare. "Yeah, Angel just bought this hotel across town and he needs some one to help clean it up and I need some place to stay while I look for a place of mine own." "Oh." He said with a very disdained tone, eyes boring into the back of Angel's head unable to see the smile he was wearing on his face while he took Faiths clothes out of the dresser.  
The soft tone of a cell phone began to ring from Torrys pocket. "I've got to go." He said quickly as he left. 'Good.' Angel thought. He'd much rather be alone with Faith any way. "So" Faith said turning her attention to Angel. "So are we almost ready to go?" Not wanting to be here if Torry came back. Together they had packed all of Faiths clothes into boxes and put them into the back seat of the car and they were both driving back to the hotel. "So, What you think of Torry?" Asked Faith not noticing that the smile completely disappeared from Angels face. "He was okay. He seems kinda creepy." 'Not to mention the fact that I could be so much better for you its not even funny' he said keeping that last thought to himself. "So....How's Buffy?" she asked slowly trying to bring up the subject. "She's fine. She and that army guy are still together." He said with some bitterness in his voice. Faith had slept with him to, true she was just trying know what it was like to be loved and to have people who cared about her, but that made him feel worse. 'I wonder if she ever wants real love' He would be happy to give it to her. It had been a long time since he had gushed over anyone.  
  
? "So what are we doing here again?" Faith said as she looked around the human and demon infested bar. "Hey we just wanted to be sure you don't turn back into phyco bitch, like last time." Cordy said giving the slayer a harsh glare. "Okay what do I have to do? Sing?" said Faith ignoring the comment. "Yeah I'll go talk to Lorne for a second. You guys go get a table." Said Angel as he walkover to the green demon. "Hey Angel face!" Whose the dark beauty?" "That's Faith he said looking around to make sure she was alright. "You like her, don't you?" said a deeply annoyed voice. Angel snapped around to see Tory standing behind him.  
  
Hey everybody! Sorry I haven't written in awhile. I 've been working on my other stories too. What do you think of my story so far? To sappy? Not enough action? Give me suggestions of what you want to see! Oh, and for A/f pairing, try reading Firecracker, 17Whatever and possibly the Vessel depending on how it ends. 


	4. About Stuff That Happened

"Torry?! How do you...What are you doing here!?!" Angel couldn't have been more shocked if he tried. How did Torry know about demons? And even if he did it seemed too much that he happened to be here the same time Faith was. Lorne, seeing the anger between the two of them decided that he would rather be some where else. "Well since you two probably have a lot to say to each other, I'll just take off." He said walking away quickly. "Found this place decided to check it out, been here a couple times." "How do you know about demons?" he said with narrowed eyes. "When your father spends most of his life dealing with unnatural creatures you pick up a few things. Like Faith being a slayer and you being a horrible blood sucking creature of the night but wait your cursed with a soul, that's supposed to make it better isn't it?" Angel took four quick steps in his directions. "How do you know anything about me or Faith?" "Heard Faith was a slayer from some guys I know. Always wanted to meet one. Got to like her, then you show up, and I wonder, what would a slayer be doing being the friend of a vampire much less moving in with one. So I do some research and find out some very interesting things. You were a real bastard you know that? By the way you never answered my question earlier. You like Faith don't you?" "I don't see what that has to do with anything." He said getting defensive. "Well maybe I think she could do much better with some one else. You know like some one who can walk out in the sunlight with her, someone who can be with her and not be afraid of having that one moment of happiness and rip her throat open." Angel immediately pushed him against the wall. "Look, I don't know what your problem is but my soul isn't go to go away ever again so why don't you just get away from me and stay out of Faith's life." He let go of him and quickly walked over to where his two friends were sitting. "Hey Angel where've ya.." "Were getting out of here NOW!"  
  
"Angel, what was that about earlier?" Faith asked when they got back to the hotel. "Faith can we talk in private for a minute?" He asked in a low and hushed voice. "Umm...sure." She said giving him a weird look.  
  
  
"So Angel you wanted to talk to me?" She asked still not understanding why he was being so weird. He was pacing back and forth nervously as she stood there waiting for what he had to say. For a second she had the insane idea that he was going to tell her he loved. Right after the thought she wanted to kick herself in the back of the head. He doesn't feel that way now get over it you stupid bitch! She felt terrible thinking about that at all. "Okay this is kind of hard say." Her heart had to be pounding at least 8 times faster then usual now. "Torry knows you're a slayer and I'm a vampire." That snapped Faith out of her momentary trance. "Huh?" "He knows, he was at the club and he told me. We have to do something about him." "Wait what?!?" Angel started to tell her about everything that had happened at the club, well almost everything he cut out some parts about her and what Torry said about how he felt. "So what are we going to do?" He asked urgently. "Why do anything?" "What do you mean!" He said completely shocked. "Angel he wanted to meet me because I'm a slayer and we became friends and he got worried about me because you were a vampire, he never did anything wrong." "He lied to you! He never told you he knew! And don't you think it's odd that he just happened to show up at the same club we did on the same night and at the same time!?!" "Will you just relax! It's like your trying to find something wrong with him just so you can get him to leave!" "That is NOT what I'm doing !!" 'That is so what I'm doing. He thought to himself. "Look, this guy is obviously bad news, you have to stay away from him!" "Hey it's my life Angel and he's my friend! And he's really sweet and nice! Just leave him alone!" she screamed at him before turning around and leaving the building. Where did he get off telling her what to do? She was just another one of his charity cases anyway even if she wanted to be something different. Even when she thought about it hurt. She'd never really been special to anyone in her whole life before why would he be any different. Her mother's words came back to her all over again. I wish you'd never been born you worthless tramp! On the way out of the hotel she ran into someone she didn't expect to see. "Oh! Torry! Hey. What are you doing here?" "I suppose Angel told you everything." "Yeah but if he says anything to you just ignore it. He's just being protective like his is of every one." "Yeah, I get that from him. He spent a lot of time telling me about some Buffy chick and how the guy she was dating. He still hung up on her. Guess he has a real thing for blondes. You perfect, golden child. Special never done anything wrong." "Yeah I get that from him to." She said feeling heart sink. He had just described the opposite of her. Nothing she could do would ever change that. He would never want her.  
  
WHAT THE HELL IS SHE DOING!!!! She can't talk to him like that! He was going to do something to her! He was going to rape her or kill her! He is going to be perfect for her and she was going to fall in love with him and he would have to watch her leave him and go off with mister perfect. The second after he thought that he knew he shouldn't have. I hurt too much. No. No way, there is something wrong with him. He just didn't know what. When your father spends most of his life dealing with unnatural creatures you pick up a few things. What kind of what did his father do?  
  
So what do you guys think? Should Angels soul be permanent or not. Give me feed back! 


	5. More Questions And A I'm Sorry

Cordelia and Wesley had both left for their own apartments but Faith had still not come back inside yet. Still outside talking to her precious Torry. Angel thought sarcastically. What did she see in him that he didn't have. It didn't matter. Right now he had to find out what that guy was up to. He still couldn't forget Faith sitting in the park where he found her right before she had passed out unable to move. A few hours later He'd found that Torry had been waiting in Faith's hotel room. "How long were you there for?" "I don't know around three, four hours." "What!? Why?" "I don't know, I couldn't move."  
Had Torry been expecting Faith to come to her room and pass out? Was that why he was waiting for her then? Only he hadn't counted on Faith just staying the park. Another thing that bothered him, Faith had changed during her short stay in prison, but Faith had let Torry get very close to her, he knew that it wasn't just his jealousy that told him Faith didn't let people in that quickly. Lorne. He was at his club. Had Lorne ever read him? Maybe he knew something. Faith. He had to tell her. But then she would just get mad at him again, and that was the last thing he wanted. If she moved away from him Torry could get closer to her. He didn't even know what that guy was up to. Was it her being a slayer? Or worse, was he just some deranged sexual psychopath.  
  
He's always trying to hug me and stuff. That made the hair on the back of his neck stand on end. He had to get that guy away from her. Faith. The rouge slayer, the murderess, the convict, the dark and beautiful goddess. He wanted her for himself, there was no use going into self denial over it. He'd thought that Buffy was the one, then Faith came along crying in the rain, begging him to kill her. He had feelings for her even then, of course he hadn't had the time to notice it before Buffy came along and turned the whole thing into her personal drama. He still cared for her and all but she was so self-centered sometimes it made him want to scream. Faith. He had to help her all over again, maybe this time she would stay for good.  
  
  
  
Better get back inside before Angel burst out the door and dragged her in by force. She noticed that he kept glancing out the window at her and Torry talking. He looked like he was going to strangle him. Why did he have to be so over protective? "Look I'd better go, Angels waiting for me." She said. A frown crossed Torry's face as he stood in front of her. "Okay then. I'll see you tomorrow." He said before walking away. Faith let out a sigh and went to the front doors of the hotel. She was just a few feet into the lobby when Angel came out of one of the back rooms. "Fait..."  
  
"Look, Angel. I'm tired. Can we just talk about this in the mourning?" Faith said offensively, walking by him toward the stairs.  
  
"Faith wait!" He watched as she turned around still giving him an icy glare. "I'm sorry, for the things I said earlier. I just.. care about you a lot, and I don't want anything to happen to you."  
  
"It's okay. I know. Just stop worrying about Torry. He's just some guy I like to hang out with."  
  
"Hey look, can I make it up to you? You said earlier you still needed some more clothes and some stuff to decorate your room. You want to go shopping with me tomorrow night?"  
  
"Sure! I'd really like that." She said giving him one of her rare smiles.  
  
?  
  
'Okay good, Faith will be with you tomorrow night, she'll be safe, and she'll be with you.' He'd given out a small smile at that thought. 'Just me and her.' Focus! Until then you have to check out that Torry guy he reminded himself. There IS something wrong with him. You're not just being deluded and paranoid. Right?  
  
Sorry this chapter is kind of short. I have a lot of stuff to do and I'm also working on a story I haven't updated in a while. Tell me what you want to happen from here. I love suggestions.! 


	6. A Trip to the Mall and a Conversation wi...

Hey guys! I just watched the ending of Angel. That's the ending? Doesn't it seem like there should be more? And thank you to The Shadower, I didn't know I was blocking anonymous reviews. Thanks!  
  
EARLIER  
  
"So what do you think?" Angel asked Lorne.  
  
"About what?"  
  
"What do you mean what about? We have been talking about the same thing for the last 10 minutes! Look I'll sum it up for you, did you read that Torry guy that was in here earlier, and if you did, what the hell did you see?"  
  
"Oh, you mean that handsome young fella with Faith on the brain."  
  
"Exactl...How did you know about Faith?" Angel said thinking about what Lorne had just said.  
  
"Well your charming young Torrys head was filled with tons of interesting facts on your dark slayer beauty. She is quite the looker isn't she?" Lorne said as Angel gave him a stone cold glare. "Sorry, didn't know you liked her so much"  
  
"I..I don't! I....just, wait, what? Faith on the brain, facts, what?"  
  
"Well he didn't actually sing for me, but on the way out, after you almost started a brawl with him, he was humming a little tune. Don't think he knew I could hear him. Anyway I got a good look at his mind. Faith seems to be the dominant issue there."  
  
"What's he going to do with her?" Angel asked demandingly. Starting to like this conversation less and less.  
  
"Thing about that is, I have absolutely no idea. I could see his immediate thoughts and information behind them but that was it."  
  
"So you have absolutely no idea what he is planning to do with her?"  
  
"No idea at all." Lorne said simple leaning back in his chair.  
  
  
  
Present  
  
Angel sat in a comfy arm chair at the side of his bedroom, thinking deeply of the conversation he had had with Lorne earlier that day. Everything about this guy kept getting, worse and worse. Couldn't Faith see that? No of course not. She never had any reasons to be suspicious; the only thing he'd ever been to her was charming. What was it about him though? The thought ended as he heard Faith quietly enter the room.  
  
"Hey Angel you almost ready to go?" Faith said looking at him with a smile on her face.  
  
"Go?" Angel said looking at her with a confused look.  
  
The sunny smile she wore on her face suddenly disappeared. "The mall, remember? If you don't want go..."  
  
"NO! I want to go! I just drifted off for minute. Come on, I'm completely ready." He said standing up smiling.  
  
Faith looked at him for a moment as her own smile returned to her lips. "Okay, we'll take your car"  
  
  
  
At a food court in the Wayside mall of Los Angles, three hours later...  
  
"Faith can we go somewhere else? We've been doing this for hours!" said Angel in an uncharacteristic whine.  
  
"Hey, this was your idea buddy. Besides, I'M having fun." Said Faith as they left the sixth store they had been to, with her carrying three bags and him behind her carrying four. "Hey didn't you say you wanted to go to that magic store to get supplies and books or something?"  
  
"Yeah I thought the clothes part wouldn't take this long though. Why don't you go ahead and you can meet me there when you're done?"  
  
"Sure, I'll hurry up; I should be there in a half hour. The only things I need to get still are a swimsuit, and something to sleep in." Faith said walking away.  
  
'Damn' Angel thought to himself. The only shopping I wouldn't mind doing. I'd better get to that magic store' Angel that trying to get the image of Faith in a bikini out of his head.  
  
?? 'Well now that that's done.' Faith thought to herself as she walked away with two new bags. She was really happy. Not that that would be a big deal for most people, but she had never really gone shopping like this before. It was usually just buy a cheap shirt and leave or shop lift, which was something she wasn't really proud of. Just another thing to add to her already bad resume. What could she say, at the time she was to young to get any legitimate job and there was no one who cared enough to see if she had any decent clothes or if she was even alive. But never mind that. Thinking about her childhood was not something she really liked to do. For the present time she was happy, and didn't really want the night to end. She was glad Angel came up with this idea. He was really sweet if not a little high strung. He was so protective. But still she could see why Buffy loved him. Not to mention to top it all off he was really handsome. Buffy and Angel. She had meet both of them at separate times but both were only thinking of the other when she did. He would always love her. She snapped out of her momentary slum and came back to reality. Angel's over protectiveness. That was what she had been thinking about. 'I wonder how he'll act when I tell him that I'm going out with Torry tomorrow night.' She thought. Torry. She had to admit that he was handsome, but he was more then that. She had never really had a friend that knew her like he did, and understood her. There was Angel, but he saw her more as a charity case. Someone to help until they could go on there own, just like all the others. Torry was that guy she always wanted. The one who cared about her, and would always be there. Maybe the two of them could be together. She would love that. He always knew how she felt, sometimes she could swear he could even read her thoughts. She had just bought a new dress for tomorrow and hoped Angel wouldn't mind. She'd never really gone on a date before, things like dates yes but not the whole nice restaurant, dress and kiss good night deal. She couldn't wait.  
  
  
  
Angel was sitting in the lobby drinking a cup of blood. Another quiet day. Not that he minded but it was unusual. Wesley and Cordelia were opening up to Faith more, though slowly and cautiously. Things were going better then ever. He heard a door close quietly up stairs, Faith must be up he turned around in his chair to see she come down the stairs in a beautiful mid- thigh black dress. Her hair was down and had been slightly curled. She look stunningly beautiful.  
  
"Faith! You look great!" That had to be the understatement of the year. "Why are you so dressed up?" he asked standing up.  
  
"Oh, I'm going out on a date tonight......with Torry." She said in a quiet voice that didn't really suit her.  
  
The wide smile that Angle had been wearing on his face disappeared completely. 


	7. A Date From Hell?

Torry. She is going out with Torry. Right now. Tonight. Wearing THAT! His head felt numb and he couldn't really think anything else. He looked at her. She was still staring at him like she was expecting him to say something.  
  
"That's..........great." he said forcing a fake smile. She smiled back at him looking relieved. He was already fighting down the urge to tear something apart.  
  
"Good. I'm glad you like him." She gave out a laugh. "By the way you were talking about him before I thought you were going to morph into your 'big brother over protective mode." She said smiling.  
  
You can NOT let this happen. Angel thought to himself. You cannot let her go anywhere with that guy. You have no idea what he wants to do with her. There was a car honk from outside the hotel.  
  
"That's him! Be back later Angel!" Faith said hurrying out the door. Angel stood there staring at the door listening to the car drive off. I should just wait here until she gets back. Screw that. He thought grabbing his jacket that was on the couch. He was going to fallow her and keep her safe if it killed him.  
  
?  
  
Faith was sitting at a table in an expensive down town restaurant. There was nice silverware and food lay out in front of her. She smiled. She loved this. No one had EVER treated her this nicely before. Well, except maybe the mayor, but her treated her like a daughter because of her slaying abilities. She was happy. A feeling she didn't often have. Except maybe when she was with Angel. But he was just a friend. The two of them together just did not mix. Besides he still loved Buffy. Besides Torry and her seemed to conect perfectly. He seemed to know everything about her and he never asked about her past. She wanted to forget the past, forget who she was and be someone else. Some one happy.  
  
?  
  
Torry looked across the table to see Faith and her beautiful smile. It was going perfect. Exactly as he had planed. The fact that she was so hot was a huge plus. He couldn't wait to get a taste of her, know what her body felt like. It would be soon enough. Then it would be just as the prophecy had said. All he needed was her then everything he wanted would be his.  
  
?  
  
Angel was sitting out side in his car parked nearby the restaurant. He could see Faith and that jackass perfectly through the large window they were sitting near. The way he looked at her was making him sick. Like all he wanted to do was touch her. How could she not see it? Did she really like him so much that she was blind to it? If she was, he had to stop her from getting hurt. He wanted to get Torry away from her, but he didn't want to see her get her heart broken. He would never do that. But this wasn't him sitting across from her. I've seen him before. He realized slowly. Not just the other day before, a long time ago before. That couldn't be. He couldn't be more then 24 at the most. Then why did it feel like he knew him. Why did this all feel familiar?  
  
Sorry I haven't written in a while. School has been driving me crazy but it's almost over then I'll be able write more. Thanks for the reviews. 


	8. A Small Aftermath

Four hours. He had been following them for four hours. To random places the jackass took her. The park, the restaurant, the theatre. He guessed there was one more place but Faith didn't want to go. He'd seen him go close to her face and whisper something with a small smile on his face. She looked at him for a moment got a nervous smile and shook her head. He almost jumped for joy when he saw that. She was just going home now. He had a look of disappointment on him that he didn't let her see. But he knew what Torry had just asked. Had he asked Faith a year ago when she was suicidal and in desperate need for attention she would have jumped into her arms. But she was different now and he and the others gave her some much needed attention. He already knew where they were going. He drove back quick to the hotel and ran into the lobby to pick up a book to have it seem like he had been reading. A few seconds later Faith came in the door.  
  
"Hey Angel." She said giving him an odd smile in a quite voice.  
  
"Faith!" he said looking up. "How was your date?"  
  
"It was okay, well you know, I thought it was. I've never really been on a "date date" before. Usually just a hop in bed."  
  
He wished she would stop staying that. That was the person she used to be. And who could blame her? She had horrible abusive parents, no one to take care of her, no one to love her, and no one ever gave her any real attention.  
  
"That's not you anymore." Angel said trying to comfort her.  
  
"Thanks." She said with a smile. "Do you think he'll call again? We didn't do all the stuff that he had planned I guess." She said in an oddly quite voice.  
  
"Even if he does call, I don't think he was right for you anyway." He said looking at her.  
  
"You never did like him did you?" Faith asked with a slight smile.  
  
"He just bugs me that's all....Are you going to go out with him again?" he said the last part not sue if he wanted an answer.  
  
"I don't know. I don't think he's what I'm looking for. He's a great friend though."  
  
YES!! Angel thought to himself. She's safe now. He could tell that she wasn't as defensive of him as she was before.  
  
"That's good. You want to go to bed?"  
  
"Huh?" she said turning to face him.  
  
That was a slip he thought. "I said are you going to bed? You look kind of tired."  
  
"Oh. Yeah. I'll see you when I wake up." She said getting up.  
  
  
  
Faith had put an her pajama's on and was now covering herself with the blankets and put her head on the soft pillow. She had had fun tonight. But the whole time she was with Torry her thoughts had kept going back to Angel. She almost started to laugh. She'd been so focused on him that she had actually thought she saw him watching her through out the date. Angel was her friend but he wasn't THAT crazy and he just didn't feel that way about her. Angel. She cared about him a lot. How much she cared she didn't really want to know.  
  
  
  
What had gone wrong?!?!?! Faith was playing into his hands perfectly then all of the sudden she pulled away. Why? She had been slightly distant but loving it. Why had she turned away. Was it because of Angel. He had been there watching them. He had never actually seen him but he could sense him near and he felt his eyes on him. There had to be away to get around him. To get him out of the picture.  
  
Hey guys, sorry this chapter is so short. I'm in kind of a rush. I'll write more later on both my stories. Thanks for the reviews everyone. I really like them. 


	9. A Prelude To Opera

Faith woke up the next morning in her own bed looking around still half asleep. 'Another day' she thought wearily to herself. Another day of demon fighting and bad guy dusting. How can I contain this joy? She just wanted to sit there for a few minuets. What had she been dreaming about? She strained to remember. I was about her. She was in a green field and the sun was shinning down. She looked around to she Angel walking toward her smiling. It had to be the middle of the day but the sun didn't burn him. He looked a little unsure as he sat down next to her. He could feel his skin lightly touching hers.  
  
"Faith? Are you happy now?" He said looking at her as if he wanted her answer more then any in the world.  
  
"Angel....." she said looking at him a smile now on her face. She reached toward him but as she did they were suddenly on a beach. The weather raging all around. The wind beating hard against her. She looked up to see Angel on the ground in front of her his face turned to the side where there stood three people. A man, a woman, and a young girl. They were all wearing ridiculously old clothing that had to be from well over 200 years ago. He looked so lost sitting there, she wanted to hold him and make it better. Something had grabbed her. And then she had woken up.  
  
Faith, still in her pajamas, walked down the stairs and into the kitchens. Maybe she wouldn't have to order breakfast. To her surprise as she walked in, Angel was already sitting there with food in front of him.  
  
"What are you doing?" She asked staring at him.  
  
He looked up at her. "Sometimes I just get cravings...for food. Do you want some?" He said the second part with slightly more enthusiasm.  
  
"Ummm yeah. I was just starting to get hungry anyway." Faith said sitting down on the stool next to him.  
  
He looked at her. "So what do you want to do today?"  
  
"I'm not sure. I don't really care. I don't have any plans." She said eating her food.  
  
He could feel his body relax at that. She was staying here no going out anywhere or going out with anyone.  
  
"Opera?" he said looking at her still.  
  
"Opera?" She said sounding and looking confused.  
  
"Well I thought that I could take everyone out to the opera. I know Wesley will go and I think Cordeila will go."  
  
"I don't know. I've never been to one before." She said. 'What hell. It's not like I'm going any where.' She thought to herself. "Sure I'll go."  
  
Angel smiled. He wasn't sure if she would like it or not but it was good excuse as any to take her somewhere.  
  
"So when are we going?" she asked with interest.  
  
"Tomorrow. That's when the show is."  
  
"Ummmm this is going to sound kind of stupid, but what should I where?"  
  
"Just a nice dress or any dress would be fine." He said thinking of the black one she had worn earlier and how beautiful she looked in it.  
  
"I'll find something." She said with a smile.  
  
Sorry this chapter is so short. I wrote it quick and I have to leave right now, I'll write more later. 


	10. Opera

"I'll find something, I'll find something." Faith kept saying over and over to herself sarcastically. She had torn apart her entire closet and hadn't found anything. She didn't often care about what other people thought of her but sometimes it was nice to just dress up and have everyone love what she was wearing. She shrugged and just guessed that everyone felt like that sometimes. The Mayor had always tried to get her to dress up and she hated it, she would rebel silently by wearing even tighter leather clothes, shorter skirts, and showing more cleavage then even she liked. She had a feeling that Angel would up and die completely if he saw her wearing any of it now. She glad he didn't see her wearing it then for that matter. She looked like a whore all the time then, she was glad Angel never brought it up. He knew though, he knew what she was; it didn't matter if he brought it up or not, he knew what she was like. Maybe she had something to wear that would prove to everyone that she changed. She found a red dress in the very back. She had bought it after Angel left and completely forgot she had it. She saw it in a window in slightly expensive store. She almost didn't buy it but she did anyway, she just returned some of the other clothes she had already gotten. It went down to her ankles with cut open sleeves. That back was open and went deep down with crisscrosses going down it in an ancient Rome style. She loved it. "Well why not," she said out loud. "I bought it; I might as well wear it."  
  
  
  
Angel was in the lobby wearing an uncharacteristic suit. With him were Cordelia and Wesley. Cordelia was wearing a long fashionable green dress that showed she wasn't afraid to show off her beauty. Wesley like Angel was wearing a tux.  
  
"Even I don't take this long to get dressed." Said Cordelia starting to get annoyed. They'd been waiting for 20 min.  
  
"Maybe she changed her mind." Suggested Wesley. "I don't see Faith as type who would enjoy Opera." Angel looked over his shoulder. Wesley may have 'forgiven' Faith but being in an enclosed space with her like a car made him nervous beyond belief.  
  
"You know what, why don't you two go ahead, here's your tickets, Faith and I will meet you there." Wesley looked incredibly relieved.  
  
"Angel don't you think we should wait with-"  
  
"No Cordelia, Angle's right lets go, no point in us all being late." He said practically pulling her out.  
  
Angel turned around once again and looked up the stairs. Where was Faith? It can't take that long to find something to wear. Maybe she did change her mind. He let out a sigh and walked up the stairs. And headed towards Faith room and knocked on the door.  
  
"Faith, You coming?" he said wondering if she heard him.  
  
"Yeah, I guess......You know Angel opera is not really my thing maybe I should just stay home."  
  
"Come on Faith, Wesley and Cordelia left already, there waiting for us there, let's go."  
  
"Fine! I'm coming." Faith opened the door. Faith looked stunning by any ones standards. She had her hair up in a messy but neat bun and was wearing silver earrings.  
  
"So.....how do I look?" she asked with an uncommon seriousness in her voice.  
  
"You look beautiful." He absolutely meant that. She looked like a Greek goddess. "Ready to go?" he asked suddenly hoping she didn't notice his stare.  
  
"Sure. What's the worst that could happen?"  
  
  
  
Faith looked around outside the old and expensive looking building. Everyone was in tuxedos and dresses with expensive jewelry. Definitely not Faith's crowd. She looked around and immediately knew she shouldn't have come. These people would never accept her. She wasn't raised anything like these people. A lot of the men seemed to keep glancing at her with odd looks. The whole thing was making her nervous. Angel who was standing next to her saw the frown on her face and hoped she didn't regret coming. He wanted her to have a good time. All the men looking at her however was driving him crazy. Part of him wanted to rip there eyes out but another part couldn't really blame them, Faith was gorgeous he could hardly stop looking at her himself. She was so close he could touch her, unfortunately she'd probably kill him for it so he kept his hands to himself.  
  
"Ready to go in?" she asked as if questioning herself more then him.  
  
"Yeah lets go. Wesley and Cordelia are waiting for us already"  
  
  
  
Faith sat in an expensive balcony seat with Angel, Wesley, and Cordelia.  
  
"Angel not that I'm one to look a gift horse in the mouth but how did you get these seats? There not exactly cheap."  
  
"A girl we helped. Her father owns the entire theatre or something."  
  
"This is fun, we should come her more often." Cordelia said smiling. "The people, the culture, the music....."  
  
"The handsome young man that was flirting with you in the lobby..." Wesley finished for her.  
  
"You are such a prude."  
  
"Am not."  
  
"Are too!"  
  
And away they go. Faith thought to herself. Noticed that Angel was being quiet and kept throwing her strange glances. 'Am I doing something wrong?' she decided to break his silence as Wesley and Cordelia bickered on next to them.  
  
"So what is this opera about? I'm not going to be able to understand it while it's happening so you might as well tell me now!" she said stretching her arms in a way that seemed a bit odd with the outfit she was wearing. Angel smiled watching her. No matter what you did to her no matter what she wore, she was always going to be Faith.  
  
"The play is called Tosca it's written by a man named Giacomo Puccini. It's a story that takes place centuries ago in Rome." He started not taking his eyes off her. "It all starts with a very beautiful and strong woman named Floria Tosca. She is in love with this guy called Cavaradossi and he loves her back, but she captures the attention of a man named Scarpia, Rome's lecherous chief of police. Scarpia knows the only way to get to her is through her lover so he goes after him. To save her lover from torture and death, she agrees to submit but kills Scarpia as he is about to claim his prize. But Scarpia extracts his revenge. Cavaradossi, dies by firing squad, Scarpia never planned to let him go. When Tosca hears this she is heart broken, not only over her lovers death but over the fact that she feels that his death was her fault. Racked with guilt she leaps to her death."  
  
"Well that's a good strong moral ending if I ever heard one." Faith said sarcastically.  
  
"It's not about morals, it's about love." He said right before the opera began.  
  
  
  
"How'd you like it?" asked Angel on there way out of the building.  
  
"I thought it was great. I still have no idea what those people were saying but it sounded beautiful." She said with a small laugh in her voice.  
  
"I could take you to more if you like. There are new ones every week practically." He said hoping she would say yes. There was nothing he'd like more then to go out with her that often.  
  
"Yeah." She said grabbing his hand. "I'd like that."  
  
  
  
Angel and Faith were alone in the dark kissing passionately when Faith felt an arm go around her waist and pull her away. She looked around, was Torry. She felt a knife suddenly in her hands. She stabbed him with it with out any hesitation. In pain he let go of her. She turned around to see that Angel was no where to be found. She started to run forward but suddenly the ground in front of her disappeared and it became a cliff she kept moving forward and started to fall.  
  
Faith sat straight up in bed giving out a small scream. 


	11. Thoughts

It took a moment for the panic inside to subside as she realized she was in her room. She heard the door swing open and Angel quickly walked in.  
  
"Are you alright?" He asked worriedly looking her over as if looking for some horrific injury. "I heard you scream." He said walking closer.  
  
"Yeah, I'm fine I just had a bad dream that's all."  
  
"You sure you're okay?" he asked again. By this point he was close enough to touch her.  
  
"Yeah, Angel. Just go back to bed." She said putting her head back on her pillow. Angel starred at her for a moment then left. She let out a sigh. He got way to jumpy sometimes. She wanted to be by herself anyway. Just some alone time to think. After a few moments her mind began to linger back to the opera she had seen earlier. It had been fun. No doubt about that. She liked spending time with Angel. She smiled. He was her best friend. Her only friend she corrected in her mind. Yeah neither Wesley or Cordelia were just going to let her starve to death in a pit somewhere but to them she may has well been some dark secret they didn't want anyone to know about. Don't look at, don't touch, don't talk to, don't talk about, and the best thing was to just ignore it and maybe it will go away. Angel was the only one she could really ever talk to, she got angry at herself when she pushed him away. She just wasn't an 'I like to build meaningful relationships' type. She loved to get noticed, she loved to get attention, but getting close to someone was not something she had ever had any real experience with. Angel, she guessed, was the only true friend he had ever had. That was special. At least she thought so. Especially with all she had tried to do to him and their rocky start. There was just something in the way he looked at her that made her feel....unique. Like she couldn't do anything wrong. At times to her they almost felt like more then friends. But that was ridiculous. They were friends. Close friends, but JUST friends.  
  
  
  
Angel walked back to his room, sat in his arm chair and picked up the book he had been reading before Faiths scream. If his heart was could beat he would have had a heart attack. But she was okay. At least he thought she was okay. She really didn't seem to want to talk about it. But then what was there to talk about? She had a bad dream, that was all. Still he wish he could have stayed. Talked to her make sure she was alright. He felt guilty about it, and wished he hadn't thought of it but he almost wished that something HAD been wrong. Nothing bad! If she was hurt in anyway he'd never be able to forgive himself. But he LOVED being her protector. Faith could look after herself, he knew that well enough, but he loved it when she needed him because.....then she actually needed him. Faith. You could drop her in the middle of a desert and she would be fine. She never really needed anyone, he just wished that she needed him. At least she didn't need Torry. He HATED that name, it was crazy. He wanted to be the one closest to Faith not second. Everything about that guy rubbed him the wrong way. How the HELL did he even find out Faith was a slayer anyway? Who could he possibly know, that would know that and tell him? It's wasn't like it was popular information. He still couldn't understand why Faith had trusted him to begin with.  
  
  
  
Faith sat in the kitchen drinking hot chocolate. She hadn't been able to get back to sleep. She kept seeing herself fall. She had thought of killing herself many times. She had tried to get Angel to kill. At one time there wasn't any way of dieing that frightened her, except one. There was always that memory of Buffy, when she stabbed her. She had jumped off that building so she couldn't use her blood to save Angel. She still remembered falling. Just falling. It was terrifying. Being able to feel your going to die, falling so quickly but not fast enough to get those thoughts out of your head. But then she had gotten what she deserved, or maybe she hadn't, maybe that hadn't been enough. Buffy. She'd found out that she was living her a week ago. She had called Angel and the two of them spent at least two hours yelling at each other over the phone. Angel finally just hung up on her. She had gone over to him to try to talk to him about it but he didn't want to. Who could blame him? It was her fault that the only woman he ever loved wasn't talking to him. She wondered if they had patched things up. She almost hoped they hadn't. She enjoyed being so close to Angel, always knowing that he went to her first to talk about anything. If he and Buffy got close again, that just wouldn't be true anymore. But what could she do about it? She let out a sigh. It was pointless. 


	12. Misunderstandings

Angel watched Faith from a distance. Watching her read a magazine, drink her soda, run her fingers threw her hair.  
  
"Stalker much?" came a voice from behind.  
  
He spun around seeing Cordelia standing behind him with raised eyebrows.  
  
"What?" He said a little surprised.  
  
"You. Your not going evil again are you?"  
  
"I don't know what your talking about."  
  
"Please. Since Faith has come here you've practically turned into her shadow."  
  
"I just worry about her. She gets into to trouble easy." He said walking back into his office with Cordelia following him and closing the door behind her.  
  
"Look. Faith gets into trouble but she can pretty much take care of herself. And that's not the reason and you and I both know it. You better hope Wesley doesn't find out."  
  
"What are you talking about?" He said pretending not to know.  
  
"You have a little crush on Faith."  
  
"I do NOT have a crush on Faith." He said out loud. 'It's much deeper then that' he wanted to say but he kept that part to himself.  
  
"Then what is it then? The truth."  
  
"Look Faith is always getting in trouble and she's going to get hurt. I take her out places so she stays safe, that's ALL. That's the reason why I've been staying so close to her." He knew she would never believe that. It was the worst lie he had ever told. His voice even shook while he said it. He thought he heard something from the other side of the door.  
  
"Angel...." Cordelia started  
  
"I just....like her Cordelia. She's a lot like me. She's fun to be around. She's my best friend. I care about her....a lot."  
  
"You care about her more then that. Why I'll never know. She tried to kill you Angel. She tried to kill the girl you were in love with. She hurt your friends, she almost killed Wesley."  
  
"That's no where near as bad as the things I've done. The only difference is that I didn't do them to you, I may have done some things in Sunnydale when I lost my soul, but that was nothing. Faith is trying to change and has save are lives a few times. I'm not asking you to like her or be her best friend but I'm asking you not to hate her for the things she's done." He said trying to change her mind.  
  
"I'll try. No promises though." She said leaving.  
  
"No promises." He said walking out behind her.  
  
He looked over into the lobby. But something was missing. Where was Faith? He looked over and saw the door left wide open.  
  
  
  
Faith looked up from her magazine to see Angel walked in his office and Cordelia follow him and then the door close. What are they doing? She got up and walked over to the door and pressed her ear against it.  
  
Angel's voce came in loud and clear. "Look Faith is always getting in trouble and she's going to get hurt. I take her out places so she stays safe, that's ALL. That's the reason why I've been staying so close to her."  
  
Faith backed away. The door made a small noise when her weight left it but by the now muffled voices she could tell neither of them had noticed. She walked away and went into the lobby but didn't stop. Instead she went out the front door. She didn't hear the door close behind her. She didn't care. She just kept walking.  
  
That's why he took her shopping? To the opera? Talked her the way he did? It hurt. She remembered early this morning, she had been thinking about him. How he was the only friend she had ever had. How he made her feel unique, special. He was the person who knew her. No one. NO ONE had ever been closer to her. She never cared for any so much. She had actually thought of him as more then a friend. She was so stupid. She was just another one of his charity cases. Stupid. Stupid stupid stupid stupid. She tried to kill him. The people he cared about. It was so ridiculous to think that he cared about her. He just didn't want her to go homicidal again. He didn't like talking to her, being with her. She kept walking. By now she could feel the tears streaming down her face. No on had ever cared for her before, why should anyone start now.  
  
She remembered holding his hand as they left the opera house. That was nothing to him. She got angry with herself every time she pushed him away. She laughed bitterly. That's what she should have done all along. She had wanted so much for him to be the one to make everything better. She was so stupid.  
  
  
  
Angel looked at the window. He couldn't look out of it he would burst into flames. Faith couldn't be found anywhere. She was gone. She had left her soda on the table the other night. He hadn't touched it. Where was she? She just took off the other night. She would have told him where she was going right?  
  
"Where are you Faith?" he said out loud.  
  
So what do you guys think? Give me reviews! 


	13. Why Leave?

Faith had been walking for a half hour now at least. She was in a park. Not just any park. The one Angel had found her in. Sitting on that bench unable to move. He had been in a rush to find her. He told her it was because he was worried. She believed that. Every word. He thought she was going to hurt or kill some one. That was the real reason he went after her. Faith walked on, unsure of where to go. She couldn't go back to the hotel. She knew she couldn't stay there anymore. Where else could she go? Besides them who in the city did she know? She knew Torry.  
  
She hadn't seen him since there date two nights ago. He said he'd like to go out with her again. Maybe....she could stay with him. Until she found a job and her own place any way. She shrugged it was worth a shot.  
  
  
  
Angel starred out the window. Where is she? He kept thinking. Yeah, Faith went out suddenly and all the time. But there was something that bothered him. The magazine she had been reading, and soda she had been drinking. They had both been left as is. Like she just got up and walked away. She would have told him where she was going right?  
  
  
  
Faith walked in to the hotel room. She let out a sigh. This was going to be the last time she ever came here. She had already decided that.  
  
"FAITH!!!"  
  
She looked over to see Angel coming toward her. He looked happy to see her. Yeah, right.  
  
"Where've you been? I thought something happened to you." He said still looking at her with those eyes. He looked so relieved, so happy to see her. He couldn't fake that could he she thought hopefully to herself. You heard what he said the other night. That's how he feels. Not what you want him to feel.  
  
"I've been....out." she said simply hoping not to make a big deal about it.  
  
"I was worried. Ummmm....you hungry? I could make something to eat." He said walking toward the kitchen but still looking at her.  
  
"Actually I was wondering if you'd.....help me pack."  
  
Angel froze where he was. "Pack?" he asked turning to her completely.  
  
"I think I should get my own place now. You know, start living on my own. I'm going to stay with Torry until I can find an apartment."  
  
She's leaving? She's LEAVING? He thought. She can't leave. Well, she can it's not like any one could stop her if they tried but....did he do something? Say something? Why was she going to Torry?  
  
"Why? I mean....I know you want your own place. But you don't have to stay with Torry. You can stay here. You don't' have to leave at all. I....mean."  
  
"I don't want to bother you. You helped me out enough. I don't want you to have to put up with me so long."  
  
Angel stood there trying to understand what she was saying. "Your not a bother. You're my best friend. You're the person whose closest to me." He said trying to convince her to change her mind.  
  
Faith looked at him. How could he sound so truthful? Maybe she had heard wrong the other night. Maybe that was just her wishful thinking. She might as well tell him what she heard. If he meant it....there was no way to deny it.  
  
"Angel.....the other night....." Suddenly the door opened and in walked Torry.  
  
Sorry this is another short chapter but I have to leave in another 5 min. How do you guys like it? True, it didn't really go any where in this chapter. But the next one will be better. 


	14. Don't Leave

"Are you ready to go?" Torry asked looking directly at Faith.  
  
"No I still have to pack." She said very uneasily glancing between Angel and Torry with a nervous look.  
  
"I'll help you." He said going up the nearby stairs up to Faith's room. "We should hurry." He said before disappearing around the corner.  
  
Angel wanted to kill him. He hated him and there was no point in hiding it. And how the HELL did he know where Faith's room was? Had Faith ever.....no. He knew she hadn't. Cordelia did have the right idea when she called him Faith's stalker.  
  
"Can I talk to you for a minuet?" he said grabbing Faith's arm and taking her into his office.  
  
"What is it?" Faith asked while Angel closed the door behind her.  
  
"Why are you leaving? Why are you going with HIM?" Angel said now feeling angry and a little betrayed.  
  
"Angel. I'm not going to hurt anyone or anything and I can do fine on my own. I'll stay with him until I can find my own place."  
  
"You don't have to leave Faith. I'd like it if you'd stay." He said trying to think of something that would stop her. "If you really want to leave, and find your own place I'm not going to stop you but don't stay with him. You can stay here while you look, I'll even help you find an apartment if you want. Maybe something nearby.....for when Cordelia gets her visions I mean. Just don't go with him."  
  
"What is your problem with Torry?" She asked. She could interpret everything else he said. He wanted to watch her to know she wasn't dead or doing something wrong. But what was wrong with Torry? If anything that would calm him down it should be that someone else is watching her.  
  
"He...just...he. I can't stand HIM! I hate the way he looks at you! The way he talks about you! It drives me crazy! He might do SOMETHING to you!" he said getting into a frantic state. "What do we even know about him anyway? That he knows a lot about you? That's more disturbing then anything else! And he's creepy and......just, I don't know."  
  
"Angel he is my friend." Faith stated.  
  
"Are you closer to him then you are to me?" he asked sadly.  
  
Faith looked at him unsure about how to answer. He didn't really care about her, right?  
  
"No." she answered. "You're my best friend Angel. Know has ever known me better then you."  
  
"Then why go with him! You could get hurt and care about you! And if anything he'll hurt you!"  
  
"How do you know?" Faith asked not understanding his train of thought.  
  
"I just do....." he said trailing off.  
  
"Angel the only reason you're so close to me is because I always get in trouble. If Torry watching me to that's less work for you." She said trying to get an honest answer out of him.  
  
"That's not true!" he said angry that she would even think that.  
  
"That's not what you told Cordelia the other night." She said with a tone of disgust.  
  
At first he had absolutely no idea what she was talking about. Then it came back to him. The other night trying to convince Cordelia that he didn't have a crush on Faith. How much of that did she hear he wondered? Obviously the middle part but what about the rest?  
  
"I was just trying to convince Cordelia that it wasn't true! I didn't mean it!" he practically screamed the last past trying to show her that it wasn't true.  
  
"What wasn't true?" Faith asked surprised at his outburst. By the look on his face she new that he was telling the truth. She knew him that well.  
  
"You didn't hear the end or the beginning or the end?" He asked not wanting to tell her TOO much. Faith would leave if she knew how he really felt. At the very least things would never be the same again.  
  
"Angel what are you talking about?" Faith confused by his now nervousness.  
  
"Ummmmm Cordelia. She just thought.....that....it sounds stupid....but..."  
  
The door next to them opened and in walked Torry.  
  
"Faith. I just wanted to know what you wanted packed." He said not taking his eyes off Angel who was giving him a death glare.  
  
"Just a second Torry I......" Faith looked over at Angel who was looking at her with a pleading stare. He didn't want her to go. Should she stay? What if he was telling the truth? Did she really mean something to him? Looking back, Angel had told her some very personal things. Things that she knew he had told no one else.  
  
"Torry....... I think that maybe I'll just stay here for a while. I should probably think about my own place thing some more." Faith said. Saying wuickly before she could change her mind.  
  
Angel look relieved and very happy with her decision.  
  
"I thought you didn't want to stay here." Torry stated with a tone of bitterness and annoyance that shocked her.  
  
"Well she changed her mind." Angel said glaring at him, as if he was the reason she wanted to leave in the first place.  
  
"I wasn't talking to you." Torry quickly shot back. Faith looked at the two. They were going to get into a fight if she didn't so something.  
  
"Will the two of you knock it off! Your acting like babies." Faith said pulling there attention away from each other and towards her.  
  
"I'll go. Faith I'll see you later." Torry said walking out.  
  
Angel looked relieved that he was gone. And walked back over to Faith.  
  
"Thanks. For staying." He said.  
  
"Yeah, well some one has to be here to keep you out of trouble." She said walking out.  
  
Angel could tell she was still a little mad at him for what he had said the other night. He wished he could tell the whole story but he was way too nervous to say it.  
  
  
  
It had been two days since she had come back. She called Torry and managed to calm him down. He wasn't mad at her anymore. Angel was another story. He was nervous around her like anything he said would make her leave. She wasn't going to but that didn't stop him from going out of his way to do stupid little things for her.  
  
As for now she was in her room. FINALLY alone. Then Cordelia walked in.  
  
"Hey your out of food time to go grocery shopping."  
  
"Go yourself if your that hungry." Faith answered sharply. "Though seeing as you never eat anyway I don't know why you care."  
  
"Cute Faith." She said with a glare. "I'm surprised to see you without your Angel shadow" she said looking around.  
  
"Don't say it. You'll jinx it. Don't send him in here. He's driving me crazy."  
  
"He just likes ya."  
  
"I wish he would go away ."  
  
"Don't say that." Cordelia said sharply.  
  
"What's your problem?" Faith shot back hearing the sharpness in her tone.  
  
"He cares about you Faith. Not to mention the fact that you have a hold on him stronger then anyone else does. He'll do anything you tell him if you try hard enough. "It's got to hurt when you say things like that."  
  
"He knows I don't mean it."  
  
"No I don't think he does. Faith he....... Just show him you at least care about him. He knows it but sometimes that isn't enough." She said then walking away.  
  
So how do you like this chapter? Sorry it's talking so long to update. 


	15. Picture Perfect

  
  
Faith walked slowly towards Angel's room where she knew he was. She might as well ask him. She knocked quietly on the door. If he didn't hear her at all she wasn't going to knock again. She was about to leave when she heard him call out.  
  
"Come in!"  
  
She let out a sigh and opened the door next to her, and walked in. Angel was sitting in a nearby chair he looked up to see who it was. When he saw who it was he quickly shut the sketchbook he was drawing in as if he didn't want her to see.  
  
"Hey, Faith. What's going on?" He asked with that all too familiar worried tone.  
  
"Nothing's wrong Angel, you can calm down." She said. "I just wanted to know if you wanted to do something tomorrow." She asked not sure what he was going to say.  
  
"Sure!" he said sounding almost to eager. "I'm mean why not. Why do you want to go out?" he asked trying not to sound too suspicious.  
  
"I've got nothing to do tomorrow," she replied glad she sounded so casual. "I thought you could find something to do."  
  
"Sure. We can find something." He said with a smile.  
  
"Kay." She said and left the room and closed the door behind her.  
  
Angel let out a quiet sigh of relief. He couldn't help the feeling of happiness that over took him. He looked down at the sketchbook that was still in his lap.  
  
He picked it up and opened it to the last page he was working on. It showed a half finished drawing of Faith. He was glad Faith didn't see this. The last 15 pages were all drawings of her. Her smiling, laying down, sleeping, posing, standing. He loved drawing her, he couldn't actually be with her the way he wanted to so drawing her was the second best thing he could think of. He couldn't even imagine Faith's reaction if she found this. He stood up and put the book back away on his shelf.  
  
???????????????  
  
Faith sat in the lobby waiting for Angel. True to her word she had nothing to do all day and now it was finally nightfall and she was bored out of her mind. Angel came down the stairs smiling at her.  
  
"SO where did you want to go?"  
  
"Anywhere I don't care. I'm so bored." She said literally jumping up. She walked quickly over to him and grabbed his hand and started to pull him out of the building. Angel was a little shocked at her eagerness and energy. He smiled though glad that she was so happy.  
  
"In a rush?" he asked.  
  
"I told you I was bored. Can we maybe get some bad guys first? I have to much energy to do anything else."  
  
"Sure."  
  
???????????  
  
They'd been out for four hours. They went to an ally and dusted some people then left to go out to eat. They found a small restaurant on the edge of town. The prices were pretty reasonable but Angel complained about the prices anyway letting something slip about a 'tavern wench' he tried to change the subject right away but Faith was laughing her head off the rest of the time.  
  
After that they just went to some of the parks and bars around town. It was about 1 A.M when they got home.  
  
"We should do that again." Faith said still smiling.  
  
"Yeah." Angel answered not showing how happy he really was.  
  
"Night Angel." She said smiling and running up the stairs.  
  
Angel waited a few minuets until he heard her door shut.  
  
"Love you...." He said quietly and walked into the office nearby. He sat down at his desk and picked up a book on the side and started to read.  
  
???????????  
  
Faith woke up early the next morning. Well, at least it was early for someone who had fallen asleep at one in the morning. She got up smiling remembering the night before with Angel. She loved those times. When it was just her and him. No one else around. She decided to see if he was awake.  
  
She went down to his room and knocked on the door, though louder then she had the night before. This time there was no answer.  
  
"Hello?"  
  
Still hearing no answer she opened the door and walked in. The room was empty. God, did this guy ever sleep?!  
  
She looked over on the bookshelf to see a maroon book, the one that Angel was holding the other day when she came into his room. She picked it up off the shelf and looked at it. I was obviously a drawing book or whatever the hell they were called.  
  
In the distance she could hear two voices at the bottom of the stairs. She ran out into the hallway. She was about to go down the stairs when she realized that she still had the sketchbook in her hands. She couldn't let Angel see it, he'd think that she was snooping around in his room.  
  
Okay so she did take something without asking and maybe that could be called snooping but still. She went into her room quick and put the sketchpad under her pillow and quickly ran to the bottom of the stairs.  
  
???????????  
  
Angel smiled as he walked into his room. Another day gone by. He was tired. He Faith and Gunn had gone after a demon they finally caught it and cut its head off. He went over to his book shelf. He wanted to draw in his sketchbook. Where was it? He thought looking around. Slowly a slight panic over took him. Where the hell was it?! He could ask Faith if she'd seen it but then she'd look for it and if she found it and looked in it the would be a lot of awkward questions.  
  
???????????  
  
Faith walked into her room and closed the door behind her. She undressed and put on her p.j's. She got into bed and put her head on the pillow when she realized it was a little lumpy. She picked up the pillow and saw the sketchpad. She realized she had completely forgotten about it and picked it up.  
  
'Well I can't give this to Angel right now. I'll put it back in his room tomorrow when he's not in it.' She continued to stare at the book in front of her. 'What the hell is in this thing anyway? Angel wouldn't care if I looked would he? Its not like theres anything he hides from me anyway.'  
  
The first pages were drawings of people she knew and didn't know. Some, judging by the clothes, were on this earth decades maybe centuries before she was born. One thing that amazed her was how realistic they all were. Leave it to Angel to surprise her when she was least expecting it. She was a little more then half way through it when she found a very familiar looking face. It was hers. Just her head and neck. Her face starring back at her with kind almost passionate eyes. Did her eyes really look like that? Or was that just what he thought her eyes seemed like. She was a little flattered. She couldn't believe that he cared enough to draw a picture of her, she was surprised that anyone would waste the time.  
  
Still smiling she turned the page, to her shock seeing another picture of her. This time it was from a side view. She was wearing a shirt and shorts that she occasionally wore and her knees were pulled up. Her head resting on her knees with her head turned as if looking for toward the viewer. Again she smiled.  
  
She turned the page once again. To see her again.....? This time standing looking up shyly, and slightly pouting her lips. Three of her? Weird but still it made her fell a little proud or flattered. Both. This time she was turned slightly away with her hand running threw her hair.  
  
She turned the page to see.....her...? What? How many of these were there? She turned page after page. All of her. What the fuck? 


	16. Untitled

Faith kept turning the page to find yet another one of her. This was starting to get a little creepy. She shut the book and looked at it in front of her. Why were there so many pictures of her? Angel was her friend but even with that this was just a little....disturbing. She wasn't sure if that was the right word. She could ask Angel about it, which would mean she would have to tell him how she got the book to begin with, which was something she really didn't wanted to do.

Faith opened it again to look at the drawings of her. Angel had gone into incredible detail in some of these. Why? Did it matter?

? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? 

Where the hell was it?! Angel looked around the room he had practically torn apart. He couldn't find. Had he taken it out of the room? He didn't think so. Then where was it.

'Okay relax. It's always in the most obvious place.'

'The 'most obvious place' would be on top of the book shelf, and its' not there, behind it, or anywhere around it.'

He had to find it. Maybe someone came into his room and-....Who would come into his room?

Faith would, she comes in here all the time looking for you or just sometimes to get......a book.

Oh crap.

? ? ? ? ? ? ? 

Faith starred at the pictures of her. She heard a noise coming from the other room, it sounded like someone was rearranging furniture or something. She heard a door open and foot steps. She closed the book and quickly put it under the covers.

The door sprung open and Angel walked.

"Faith........Have you seen a book in my room? A sketch book? I can't find it and was just wondering if you'd seen it?"

Faith could feel all of her muscles tighten and her heart pound four times louder in her chest.

"Uh.....no I haven't seen anything like that around here. I could help you look for it." She said innocently. She felt incredibly guilty for lying and was completely sure he had seen right through her.

"No, that's okay. I'll find it sooner or later." He said turning and leaving the room.

She let out the breath she had been holding. How was she going to get the book back in Angel's room now?

? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? 

Faith didn't have it, which was good. But did she really not have it or was she lying? Why would she lie? Angel continued down the hall. Did she have or had she seen it? He wanted her to be telling the truth. He wanted to think that she hadn't seen it. But he wasn't sure.

I'm sorry its been so long and I'm REALLY sorry this is so short but schools staring and I've had family over so I'm starting to go out of my head. I'll try to update A LOT more soon. This should only be another couple chapters.


	17. That Fire

Faith sat in her room. She had hidden the sketch book. Not that she was proud of that fact. Sitting there now she was glad he had drawn those pictures of her.

That meant he at least noticed her. And that was a good thing. Why was that a good thing? Because it made her feel good. Why did it make her feel good? She didn't know. Maybe because no one had ever given her positive attention before.

Well she'd been given attention. Just never any good attention. Not until Angel.

He was her Angel. She smiled a weary smile. How was she supposed to tell him she took something of his then lied about it? She couldn't. She didn't want him to think anything bad about her.

Well then this was perfect wasn't.

? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? 

1869 France

A small blonde woman looked up from the couch she had fallen asleep on to see her dear boy sitting on a chair in front the fire. There was a girl on the floor in front of him. Obviously dead. She had long dark hair. Her dress had been torn in some places. There had to have been a struggle.

This one hadn't gone quietly. This one had fought.

Angelus was drawing on a piece of paper. Switching his stare from the body to the sketch pad. Another one of his drawings. Always of his victims. Not all of them. Just some of them. She didn't understand what made these few so special.

"Another one of our dead beauties sweetie?" she said with a smile. "She looks like she was yummy."

"Sure." Angelus said quietly not really paying attention.

The smile on the woman's face disappeared.

'Fine be that way. I'll go out with out.'

She got up with out saying a word and stormed off.

Angelus noticed but didn't do anything. He needed to concentrate on his drawing. Besides she was hot headed. She whined like a child when she didn't get what she wanted. If he didn't give in she'd go back to her 'master'. Then he'd get bored and go get her. Women of this time were so predictable.

He liked the stories of ancient Rome and Egypt. Where women were strong and intelligent all the time. Of course at those times women were men's equals.

Now they all dressed up like china dolls. And acted like complete giggling idiots. At times he could just dismiss it but when he started to think about it he got angry.

The woman and men of this age were pathetic, at least in his mind.

He loved it when his victims fought. It gave him a sense that people wouldn't always be this way.

This one had fought. He wished he had changed her instead of killed her. Oh, well.

Women who fought him didn't leave his mind like his other victims did. Their faces and voices stayed in his mind for days. He'd compare all others to them during that time.

Neither Darla nor Drusilla ever fought him. They just agreed with everything he said. True Darla would more along the lines manipulate him.

Yes he loved being in control. Yes he loved being the one giving orders the one with the plan. But he was getting sick of it.

He wanted someone with that fire in their veins.

? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? 

A girl with dark brown hair flied into the hard cement wall of a near by build. Faith looked up only to see the demon run toward her.

She ducked and rolled and got passed it. She grabbed the knife she had dropped on the ground picked it up a twirled around to sink it in to the scaly back.

She watched the thing fall to the ground and give it's last breath.

Angel ran around the corner to see Faith in the ally next to the hotel. The demon that had burst in was on the ground in front of her not moving.

He looked at her. Her hair was a mess and she was breathing heavily making her chest rise and fall.

"You got him. Are you okay?" He said running up to her and putting his hand on her shoulder.

The feeling of his hand on her shoulder made chills go up and down her spine. She might have to remind him about her after slaying 'energy'

She wanted to be closer. Maybe just a nice hug.

She rapped her arms around him without any warning. His chest felt great.

"Faith what are you…?"

She looked up and kiss him on the cheek. He stared at in shock what was she doing? Did it matter. He leaned down and kissed her.

How do like the ending? There will be more in the next chapter.


	18. Old Friends

This feels good. Faith thought as he continued to kiss her. He held her tighter. She could see why Buffy liked this so much. Buffy. Oh, God. She shouldn't be doing this.

At the last thoughts she instantly pulled away. Angel obviously didn't get the message because he started kissing her throat.

"Angel…."

Suddenly there was a noise of some one clearing their throat loudly. Both of them looked over in the direction the noise had come from to see a very pissed off looking Buffy and a shocked and disgusted looking Willow.

Faith felt like a deer in headlights. She could move. She was only vaguely aware of Angel's arm still tightly wrapped around her waist.

"Buffy?" Angel asked. "Buffy…what are you doing?"

"I could ask you the same thing." She said arms crossed glaring at the two.

"Nothing." Faith said pushing herself away.

"Yeah it really looks like nothing." Buffy snapped. "You trying to turn him evil again." She said taking a step closer.

"Leave her alone." Angel said rising to Faith's defense while slowly edging toward her. He didn't like the way Buffy and Willow were looking at her.

"Of, course you would defend her. Fine chose her over me again. I don't care." To Buffy's slight dismay Angel didn't correct her when she said he was choosing Faith over her.

"Don't start fighting." Faith said feeling defenseless. Why did this always happen around her? What was it about her that made the people around her fight and hate each other? She was always the cause, and she knew it.

Buffy glared at her. "Don't even start with that vulnerable little girl crap."

"Buffy leave her alone." Angel said getting more tense, there was probably no place in the world more dangerous then a fight between two vampire slayers and a witch. "Let's just go inside. We can talk there."

What he really wanted to do was be alone with Faith. He wanted to talk with her…about what just happened. He wanted to touch her again.

Probably wasn't going to happen.


End file.
